Evaluating Intercultural Communication

In a cosmopolitan country like Singapore, it is important to be aware of the differences in communication style and behavioral norms across different cultures. In fact, gaining such an understanding can help to avoid potential conflicts and improve relationship building skills with people of different cultural backgrounds.

I was at a pubcrawl held recently on a Friday evening.  There was a group of Brazilian guys who were very friendly and rowdy. One of the guys, Thiago, was particular dashing and charming with the ladies. While the Singaporean guys would hold their drinks and talk in a gentlemanly fashion with the ladies, he would jump about in an excited manner and drag them to dance with him. Social barriers and personal space was virtually non-existent to him. I could see that the European ladies were particularly entertained by him. However, the same cannot be said of this Singaporean lady. He went up to her to strike up a conversation. As I was standing a distance away, I could not hear their conversation over the loud bar music. The lady was giggling shortly after. As a new song came on, Thiago got so excited that he kissed the girl behind the ear, dragged her to the dance floor and … ( I am aware that the blog post calls for detailed description of the process but I think some details here are best left to the imagination J )

The Singaporean lady was taken aback by this sudden advance and she pushed herself away from Thiago and went back to the safety of her lady friends.

After talking to some of the Brazilian guys, I got to understand that the Brazilians are particularly passionate. It is in their nature, even normal, to party at night and be physically intimate with girls they just met. To them, it is just their way of socializing. However, to the Singaporean ladies, they prefer physical distance and getting to know the other party better before being comfortable with more physical intimacy. Even so, that same behaviour is welcomed and loved by the European ladies who enjoyed their night out. A French lady told me the difference between Asian and European men is that Asian guys are too shy.

This small incident taught me the different expectations that ladies of different nationalities have of men, particularly how different cultures show their love and passion for each other. It is an interesting lesson in making friends from different borders. J